If we were to play word association and I said “liquor” and “most exciting two minutes”, you’d probably think I was describing a good Friday night with your girlfriend.  If I were to expand the game and say “mint julep” and “fastest two minutes in sports”,  it’d be a no-brainer, the Kentucky Derby.

The 138th running of the Derby is next weekend and dozens of celebrity hotties will flock to Louisville with big @$$ hats and cutie-patootie dresses.  I don’t get it. You spend all afternoon pounding pops with mint leaves in them only to watch little men whip four-legged versions of NASCAR make four left turns.  And in two minutes, it’s over.  Hooray!

Then again, these twenty-five celebrity babes are probably all too familiar with the whole “two minutes and it’s over” routine.

Paris Hilton

Photo of Paris Hilton at the Kentucky Derby

 

Marissa Miller

Photo of Marissa Miller wearing a big hat at the Kentucky Derby

 

Erin Andrews

Photo of Erin Andrews wearing a big hat at the Kentucky Derby

Photo of Erin Andrews wearing a big hat at the Kentucky Derby

 

Aubrey O’Day

Photo of Aubrey O'Day wearing a big hat at the Kentucky Derby

 

Danica Patrick

Photo of Danica Patrick at the Kentucky Derby

 

Gabrielle Union

Photo of Gabrielle Union at The Derby

 

Jennifer Love Hewitt

Photo of Jennifer Love Hewitt at The Derby

 

Jenny McCarthy

Photo of Jenny McCarthy at The Derby

 

Maria Menounos

Photo of Maria Menounos at The Derby

 

Kendra Wilkinson, Bridget Marquardt and Holly Madison

Photo of Kendra Wilkinson, Bridget Marquardt and Holly Madison at The Derby

 

Julie Benz

Photo of Julie Benz at The Derby

 

Petra Nemcova

Photo of Petra Nemcova at The Derby

 

Miranda Lambert

Photo of Miranda Lambert at The Derby

 

Kim Kardashian

Photo of Kim Kardashian at The Derby

 

Kate Gosselin

Photo of Kate Gosselin at The Derby

 

Ashlee Simpson

Photo of Ashlee Simpson at The Derby

 

Jessica Simpson’s boobs

Photo of Jessica Simpson at The Derby

 

Kate Walsh

Photo of Kate Walsh at The Derby

 

Bethenny Frankel

Photo of Bethenny Frankel at The Derby

 

Heidi Montag

Photo of Heidi Montag at The Derby

 

Jordin Sparks

Photo of Jordin Sparks at The Derby

 

Linda Cardellini

Photo of LInda Cardellini at The Derby

 

Nancy O’Dell

Photo of Nancy O'Dell at The Derby

 

Vanessa Minnillo

Photo of Vanessa Minnillo at The Derby

Niki Taylor

Photo of Niki Taylor at The Derby